I shrug out from under her hand, trying to duck the physical manifestation of Time Passing.
We are there to celebrate my sister, who has built and birthed another baby. She is a beautiful girl, tiny and quiet.
Here are our three children in a room. We clamor around them. I can't seem to get my head around the way life moves. Why doesn't everyone else seem so amazed? Yet, you must be thinking: Aren't these boring revelations? To sit around oohing at the stars, talking about infinity?
We vascillate between this lucidity and the slow sound of PJ Harvey's voice steady in the air, "Is that all there is? If that's all there is, my friends, then let's keep dancing. Let's break out the booze..."
We attend a wedding in my hometown of Fargo, North Dakota. We visit Dave's family in nearby Thief River Falls. His great-great-grandfather's homestead proudly marked "1904." Dave's father still owns the land and farms there, every season. The horizon just sits there, a cornflower blue sky floats silent & still atop the empty fields. What are we doing, running around like rats in the city?
The thought is full. For a moment. We drive back. Every choice we ever made bringing us back to what we've chosen.
I accept this dream we've built. Knowing it's ours. The dream of us. The dream of our family.
New babies & future babies we tightly love. The weddings and funerals that tick off Time for us. The grey hairs that grow. With life so full of gladness & sadness.
May all of our baggage be full of blessings. Amen.
|Dax in front of his great-great-great grandfather's homestead in Thief River Falls, Minnesota|